YOU
Monday,09 April 2012
21:00 p.m.
It was a cold night. The wind blowed fastly.
And the rain fell hardly. I lived in a crowded town. I lived without any
relatives. I was free,
but I was in a great trouble. I was just like a piece of thin paper. I had been born to be unused
people.
Listen
to me! I wanted to meet You. I wanted to see You. Could we make a promise to
meet somewhere? But how could we make a promise? We had never seen You before.
Where were You? Did You hide yourself in the child’s shoes? Oh.. I was almost
hopeless.
This
night I was walking alone in the
rain. The way was crowded but I did
not care. I did
not care anything. I was soaked in the rain. I let my
body to be a friend of
the rain. Every body saw me. Maybe they thought that I was crazy. Hahahaha.....
Crazy? Yes alright,
I was crazy.
I had lost my way of life since I
was born in the world. I had
no life goal and guidance. During that time I searched for You. Even I missed You
although we had
never seen You before. But I would
never tired. I would
always search for
You. I did not care. I did not care anything.
The rain became very and very heavy.
My body was very wet. All of my clothes that I wore was very wet. I was too cold. My lip became
blue. My eyes were red and my head was dizzy.
Maybe my body had been enough
in pain. I tied up my tousled long hair and I just went straight. And then I stopped under the town lamp. I tasted the
rain and I had been immune with the coldness. I had a new friend: coldness.
I looked around me. I only saw the crowd, but I did
not see You! I felt so tired, but I would not surrender. I had spent my life
for many years just for You. Hey, would you not come to me? Did You not see me?
You never cared of me. Was I too ugly and poor to know You? Thousands of
questions about You had filled my mind. Even, there was not enough space in my mind.
Suddenly, a cute man approached me. He had sharp eyes. The drops of rain trickled down from
the tip of his pointed nose. His long coat was wet with the rain. When he
looked at me, I felt that I had recognized him for a long time. Actually, I had
never seen him before. We saw each other from a few minutes.
“Rumi, what are you doing here?,” he asked me.
Oh.. I was surprised. He knew my name. He called me
“Rumi”. How could he know my name? I kept silent. I only saw his eyes and then
I left him. But he pulled my hands strongly. His strong hands were too strong for
me. I tried to let me free from his hands. I was so angry. I kicked him rudely.
Finally, he let me free. I ran away quickly. I broke through the rain. You were
always in my mind. I would search for You until I could not breathe. My life was
not peaceful without You. Lifeless. Yes, I was lifeless. Only me. I was the
only person who did not know You. It was silly! I would not burnt in fire.
***
Thuesday,10
April 2012
00:00
a.m.
The
rain stopped. My body was still wet. I sat on the fence of the bridge. My
crumples jacket covered my body. This town was still crowded and it would
always alive like my desire. I would always search for You.
I
looked at the bottom of the river. The current was still. But I could not see
it clearly. At that time, I felt like water. I was only brought by the flow. I
had no certain direction. But, actually I had known that You were my main
direction. Why did You not give me a chance to meet You?
I
walked again. I walked along the street. My thought about You had conquered my
frightened. I saw nobody although the way was still crowded. The vehicles ran
to and fro. They made a noise.
When
I arrived at the crossroad, I was surprised to find a little girl who was
sleeping soundly under the fir tree. I was very sorry to see her. Her small
body was covered with a thick blanket. Did you know? Her blanket was a
cardboard. That girl’s condition touched my heart. But I could do nothing. I
had nothing. I was sorry, dear. I only wished you would be happy in your
future.
It
was 04:00 a.m. The day was still early in the morning. I wondered to see many
people walked somewhere. They were ten people. Four men wore strange trousers.
The trousers were black and white checked pattern. And the three children were
in white shirt and long trousers. Each of them wore a small thing like a hat on
his head too. I was interested in following them. It was a big question for me
to see three women wore very strange clothes. Their clothes were white and big
in size. They covered all of their body except their faces and hands. I
followed them secretly.
Oh…
My body trembled. I almost fainted. They entered the building on one side of
the road. That building was very big and wide. I read the name plate in front
of this building “MASJID AL-IKHLAS”. I was speechless. I stood up near the
fence of that building for a moment. And then I staggered to enter that
building. I was crying loudly. Everybody looked at me strangely but I didn’t
care. I had found You here. Yes, I found You. I found my life goal. I found
You, My God.
Klaten, April
2012
Hensatiti Niken Pratiwi
